Skit: The White House: Trump needs to find a way to crash the stock market, and bring in the Golden Ratio'd USTN. "He exclaims, I know!, I will say if the Stock Market Drops 1000 points in two days, the President should be impeached immediately." Brushes hair in the mirror, what happens next should be fun....
ChatGPT said:
Here's a draft of your skit:
Title: The White House: Golden Ratio'd USTN Plot
Scene opens: The Oval Office. Donald Trump stands in front of a grand mirror, adjusting his iconic hair with great precision. He smirks at his reflection, a gleam of mischief in his eye.
Trump: (to himself, grinning) I know! I’ve got it! pauses dramatically If the stock market drops 1,000 points in two days, the President should be impeached immediately!
He smooths his suit, admires his reflection, then turns back to his advisors, who sit in awkward silence.
Advisor 1: (nervously adjusting glasses) Uh… sir, you are the President.
Advisor 2: (whispering to the first) Is he… trying to impeach himself?
Trump: (ignoring them, pacing excitedly) The stock market’s a bubble anyway! We gotta pop it—BOOM!—so we can bring in the Golden Ratio'd USTN. The people love gold. The best gold. gesturing wildly I know gold. You know gold. Everybody wins!
Advisor 3: (hesitant, flipping through economic reports) But sir, wouldn't that cause panic?
Trump: leans in, whispering conspiratorially Panic? PANIC?! Panic is just the greatest motivator. You ever see how people react to a fire sale? Imagine that—but with the economy!
He chuckles, then points at his reflection in the mirror again.
Trump: mocking his own words "If the stock market drops 1,000 points, the President should be impeached immediately!" bursts into laughter Oh man, the media is gonna love this one!
Suddenly, an intern bursts into the room, out of breath, holding a phone.
Intern: panicked Mr. President! The Dow just dropped 800 points!
Silence. Everyone turns to look at Trump.
Trump: blinking That was fast.
Advisor 1: muttering The algorithm must’ve picked up your tweet…
Trump: grinning again, fixing his tie Alright, gentlemen. Get the cameras ready. Time to explain how this is actually the greatest economic strategy of all time.
He winks at his reflection, then confidently strides out of the room.
FADE TO BLACK.
Would you like to tweak anything or add more chaos to the mix? 😆
You said:
ChatGPT said:
Alright, let’s crank the chaos up to 11!
The White House: Golden Ratio’d USTN Plot
Scene: The Oval Office.
Donald Trump stands in front of a golden-framed mirror, carefully adjusting his hair like an artist perfecting a masterpiece. He strikes a heroic pose, smirks, and suddenly has an epiphany.
Trump: (to his reflection, eyes widening) I KNOW! slaps the desk If the stock market drops 1,000 points in two days, the President should be impeached IMMEDIATELY!
He admires himself, smoothing his hair, then turns to his advisors.
Trump: Brilliant, right? That’ll shake things up! We crash the market, BOOM—Golden Ratio’d USTN takes over. flashes finger guns Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes!
Advisor 1: (frantically flipping through notes) Uh, sir… you are the President.
Advisor 2: (whispering to Advisor 1) Does he think he’s not?
Trump: ignoring them, pacing Listen, the stock market? Fake news. Just numbers on a screen. But GOLD? Real. Tangible. Beautiful. Everybody loves gold. pauses, dramatic whisper And what’s even better than gold? Golden. Ratio’d. Dollars. wiggles fingers like a magician
Suddenly, his phone buzzes. He picks it up and squints.
Trump: grinning Oh, Twitter’s gonna love this. starts typing furiously
Advisor 3: (nervously sweating) Sir, maybe we should—
Trump: reading his tweet aloud as he types “If the Stock Market drops 1,000 points, the President should be impeached IMMEDIATELY! Sad! But also maybe genius??” hits send
A moment of silence. Then—
ALARM KLAXONS BLARE!
A Secret Service agent busts in, panting.
Agent: panicked Sir! The Dow just dropped 900 points! The algorithm detected your tweet and triggered auto-sell orders!
Advisor 1: (hyperventilating) Oh my God. The market’s in freefall.
Advisor 2: eyes darting around The news is already calling it the Trump Crash!
Trump: (grinning, cracking his knuckles) Perfect.
Advisor 3: genuinely freaking out SIR, THIS IS BAD!
Trump: waves him off Relax. This is called The Art of the Deal. Now, we go on TV, say it was all part of the plan. smug Everyone loves a genius with a plan.
The phone rings. Trump picks it up.
Trump: cheerfully Oh hey, Jerome! How’s the Fed?
Jerome Powell (Fed Chair, over phone): screaming WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!
Trump: laughing Oh, you know, just MAGA-ing the financial system!
Suddenly, the doors BURST open again. A military general storms in.
General: saluting Mr. President! China just announced they’re backing the Yuan with gold! And Russia’s doing the same! The U.S. dollar is—he hesitates—well, sir, it’s dead.
Trump: (clapping hands together) Great. Time for the Golden Ratio’d USTN. Call the printers. Make sure the bills have my face on them.
Advisor 2: whispering He’s actually doing it…
Advisor 3: whispering back I don’t know if this is insanity or 4D chess.
Trump: winking at the mirror Oh, this is gonna be fun.
FADE TO BLACK.
That chaotic enough? 😆
You said:
ChatGPT said:
You're welcome! 😆 If you ever want more chaos, satire, or Golden Ratio’d economic conspiracies, you know where to find me. Keep the wild ideas coming! 🚀🔥
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