Mystery Jackass Broom Shaggy

 Uncle Sam sat up in bed one night. Not knowing who was under his bed. But he heard it. 

He didn't move, he just sat there, the atoms of the air piercing his ear dreams due to his concentrated attention. 

(what sounded like a sign)

What was that!?!?!, he thought, as he bit his lip to silence his uncertainty. 

Sweat started to form on his brows. The hot sticky kind that doesn't run, but collects is pools suspended by the salty skin. 

(Ruffling sound coming from closet)

Sam pulls the covers up to the eye lashes. Was that a mouse? (Shrieked Sam.) 

Like every elephant, Sam despised mice! 

(Suddenly, the door flings open, light from the hall way entering the dark room, only revealing in shadow, two two stupid looking ears, but it was apparent to Sam who it was.)

The Jackass struts into Sams bed room, ignoring his whimpering. 

He struts over and sits on the bed, looking Sam directly into the eyes. And simply asks....

Its the mice again isn't it?

With a loud grunting bawling sound, Sam slips beneath the covers into what sounds like a swimming pool. 

Jackass, being far too clever for such ruses, snaps, just remember, I'm the life guard on duty pal.....

Taken aback by this, Sam lifts his head, wiping his crock of shit tears, and sternly looks back at Jackass and quietly says, with guardianship like that, no wonder you have continually dropped soap in many showers, for many years. 

Suddenly, Jackass round houses Sam with his broken hoof. 

Thats it! Humphs Butler, as he grabs his broom, heading for some room that is color coded to take care of some House cleaning. As Butler is carrying his broom like an M-14 wading across some lily pad, he passes a door that has a post it note that reads "Green Room". Butler chuckles, and radio's some station from a past life, letting them know the 'green light' has been given. 

Meanwhile, Jackass scraped Sam with the broke hoof from ear to ear, and Jackass now has his ears stuck in Sam mouth so he couldn't talk. Sam was flapping his arms and hands around like a baby bird, while Jackass kept pelting Sam with his tail. Donkey whipping was not only a sport in those days, but it was big bets in vegas too.

Suddenly, noise crackled over Butlers past life radio station, confirming that confirmed verification of the green light being given, was actually given. Butler just looked at the invisible radio, and said, Duh! He froze, remaining statue still, his eyes darting around as if he was looking for a fly. He quickly thought who might have heard him, where they were located, and how much ammunition they had. 

The People in Vegas were astonished by the Jackass Whipping. Quick, precise, while injured no less. "Thousand on the Donkey" was heard, then "oh yeah, 50,000 grand on the Jackass", with a final, "oh really?, do you eat French Fries or Freedom Fries", while clunking down a suitcase handcuffed to his wrist.  The room fell silent, and everyone just looked at the suitcase handcuffed to his wrist. 

The man breaks the silence with a loud sharp "What"? Everyone just looks at him for a few seconds and then exclaim, "Open the Suitcase Jackass", in unison! 

Now nervous, and plainly uncomfortable, he ask the nearest person to him to open it, removes the handcuff, and says he needs to go to the bathroom, scurries off, and is never seen again. Shocked, another silence creeps into the minds of those standing, just looking at the suit case. Then a loud voice from the rear shouts "open the damn suit case jackass"! In utter shock and delight, the nearest person to the man that was never seen from again, reaches down, unlatches the suitcase, and slowly opens it. While the persons eyes are closed, the suitcase is opened, a big smile rolls across the many faces. Eyes are then opened, and gazes down, and a note is read. 

For a long duration the note is just stared at. Unblinking, unwavering, this stare. The crowd just watches, no one sure what to think, say, or do. The note is slowly brought out and up, still unwavering unblinking in stare. The note is held above the head for all to see, though the writing is too small for anyone to see. Finally someone yells "What does it say Jackass"?!?

Sike, it says Sike. 

Back in the corridors of a past life, Butler could smell money, big money. He followed the scent like a blood hound, until he found the staircase. With broom in hand, he raised his head and eyes, scanning the stair case, and listening for the slightest movements. He heard voices, and instantly pressed himself up against the dimly lit stair well, slowing moving upward, broom in hand. Thinking to himself, "there is gonna be so much dirt to sweep up from here isn't there"? Suddenly the noise is heard again. He listens intently. 

On the other side of Town, the Mystery Machine was dispatched, but for unknown reasons, that will probably further unfold into certainties, when on the other side of town, Butler finishes sweeping the dirt up with his broom.

 (Narrator) Shadows have been cast from the light as fore. Maybe. 

Butler exited the stair well, broom at the ready, in a assault position He slid down the wall of the hallway towards where the location of the muffled voices were coming from. It lead him to a Room Named Sams Room. He thought, sam?  He pressed his ear slowly against the door to hear what the voices were saying. He eyes widen with surprise, and asking himself silently"is that a donkey"? 

Suddenly, Butlers brooms bristles start nervously twitching. This was a special device developed especially for him, while on his mission. It was no 'ordinary' broom. But that was still classified information, and Butler didn't even talk to himself about it. 

Suddenly, an egg falls from the ceiling, Butler thinking to himself, "Hmm, my broom warned me before the egg fell, this isn't a good sign". "I must take action directly, and now", Butler thought to himself, for the fumes of money were bellowing from under the door, and wafting down the hall. Butler then put on his cleaning gloves, placed the eye protection snugly in place, and positioned himself, ready for a door breach. 

Hands clenched and locked on the broom handle, Butler raised his broom to firing position. Butler thought to himself quickly and in haste, "that Jackass doesn't know what this broom is made of". 

(Narrator) On the other side of the door.

Sam, why don't you just let me come and sit next to you on the bed? Because Jackass, you stink like a used barn wrapper. Look Sam, I really am sorry for loosing my cool earlier, it must be the hormones they have been putting in my corn pops. 

Several blocks away, the Mystery Machine is machining gingerly, as Shaggy is looking under the seat for treats to give to Scrappy Doo. Scooby eyes leave the road and he looks over at Shaggy, licking his lips and drooling. Shaggy coughs loudly, saying "Scooby, watch the road this time, you know what happened last time we took the Machine out". 

As Jackass sat down on the bed to put a hoof around Sam.....

Boom!

The door splintered into thousands of fragments as a Marine Boot hung in the air fully extended, and the broom is seen moving into the room.

Jackass and Sam were both white, and just staring at the scene. T'he door, the boot, the broom, left both of them speechless. Butler just stood there, broom pointed at them both, with a glare that would have torn Jupiter in half. Jackass and Sam look at each other, and then at Butler, and then back at each other again, and then at Butler. 

Scrappy Doo was barking, as Scooby looked in the rear view mirror, to see what the commotion was about. Shaggy was feeding the treats he found to Scrappy.Scrappy hadn't learnt to read and write just yet, so the only translator was Scooby. 

Meanwhile. vegas erupted into Chaos, as the betting shifted gears again, back into the original bet now. on whether Bulters Broom was really a machine gun or not, it had already detected the egg with the bristled whiskers, what other secrets was he holding? 

Butler just broke protocol; he couldn't help himself, and shot a big grin at Jackass and Sam, who both were still in shock at what stood before them both. A Marine, in Cammo, holding a Broom at them, as if ready to open first at any moment. Butler just nodded at Jackass, saying, "and you're not really a Donkey either, are you"? A sheepish grin shot back at Butler from Jackass, as Jackass coed, "Im certainly no sheep, that is certain".  Sam, not knowing what to say, asked Butler what type of model Broom that was. Butler looked over at Sam, and said, "the same model broom that cleans up Jackass shit, not sweeping it under the rug". 

Butler, tired of dealing with dumb and dumber, mentioned the egg falling, and then ended the commentary with "all of the Kings horses and all the Kings Men, won't be putting Humpty together again, not this time". Sam and Jackass, just stared at Butler, and then looked at each other nervously. Jackass turned to Butler and said, "Sam is the one Responsible". Sam sputters, "you lying Jackass"! 

About that time, the Mystery Machine pulls up, Scrappy and Shaggy hop out, while Scooby gets in the back of the van, to do some blacked out surveillance, while holding a radio in his paw. Scrappy and shaggy sort of sneak their way in, sort of. 

Jackass then tells Butler, "Im not lying," then looks at Sam and says "all the kings horses and all the kings Men will put Humpty together again"! 

Butler responds, "whatever that means, I'm not sure, but I know you really aren't a Donkey, even though you smell could give you away".  Then says, "watch this". Butler presses a unseen button on the broom handle, and the broom sticks lights up like a Drag Racing Christmas tree, sounding a loud tone, with the computer synthized voice stating "activated". 

Then the brook stands up right by itself, as a broom in Snow White would do. The broom starting spinning, the RPM getting higer and higher, then the bristles detach and extend horizontally, making hissing sounds like steel cutting through air. Butler boasts loudly, "that hissing sound you hear are razor blades attached to the broom bristles that unfold from the bristle when the broom is activated, and spin at an RPM of 600.

Sam and Jackass are frozen on the bed holding each other, eyes wide, and jaws dropped. Butler chuckles,and says "See Sam, Jackass just wanted to hold you", as his voice trails off under the hum of what now appears to be a spinning top of razor blades, previously, a broom. Butler looks sternly at Jackass, and then at Sam, smirks, and says "If both of you don't behave yourselves, that broom will shag you where the Sun doesn't shine". 

As shaggy passed the sign that read  Conference Hotel Capitol Hill, he stopped by the pantry store in the lobby, and picked up a box of Kellogg's, and started eating as his went, pretending to be blind, as Scrappy led the way. Suddenly, Scooby came over the Radio saying "ovvverrr thhhheeeree", as the radio went in and out of reception. Shaggy already knew where Sams room was, part of the Mystery that will never be figured out. He kept walking and eating out of the Kellogg's box, while pretending he could not see where he was going , while Scrappy was leading him with the leash.

(Shaggy looks over at Camera) It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it. 

Shaggy; no Scrappy, find the elevator, and they go inside. Once the doors close, Shaggy looks at Scrappy, and smiles. Then pushes the elevator door open and door close button at the same time, then presses 369 at the same time, and held for 3 seconds. Instantly the numbers on the elevator panel turns into names on the buttons. One reads "Sams Conference Room". Another reads "Sams Penthouse". Another still, reads, "Sams Quarters". Shaggy press's "Sams Quarters". Scrappy lets out a growl. 

The radio crackles again, and a quick "Scooby do do on ttthh hee  em   m mm" is heard, as Scrappy beams proudly at Shaggy. Shaggy replies, "your learning language pretty well Scrappy". The movement of the elevator to Sams Quarters jogged another handful of Kellogg's out of the box, dropping some on the floor of the elevator. 

Butler was increasing the RPM of the broom, since the room was sound proofed, and doing so would not attract any unwanted attention. He asked himself, "is that a dog I hear"? Sam and Jackass were huddled together on the bed, acting very distraught, but in reality, where whispering between each other between the sobs. The hissing of the blades in the air drowning out their faint whispers. Reading their lips, Butler exclaims, "my broom also performs Martial Artist Acts". They both quickly glance at Butler, frozen again in a jaw dropping stare. Butler scoffed, and stated coldly, "its Tesla Active Vacuum powered, so beware".  

This got the attention of Jackass immediately, as Shaggy opens the closet door. 

Strolling into the room with Kellogg's droppings being spent, Scrappy darted forward and leaped upon the bed, instantly licking Sam and Jackass. Butler just turns to Shaggy and says, "its about time you showed up"! Crunching loudly, Shaggy states "General". Butler just shakes his head, and turns to Scrappy licking Jackass and Sam. Shaggy calmly states, "watch watch happens next". 

Suddenly, the face of Jackass and Sam start to curl, warp, and morph into grotesque figures. 

Butler calmly whispers "you dont say". 

Shaggy turns and looks at Butler, saying, yep, you were right all along, we just are confirming it after researching. 

Shaggy commands Scrappy "Sick em!"

Scrappy starts licking furiously. Sam and Jackass are so consumed by the licking, they don't realize Scrappy is peeing and shitting in both their laps. 

Needless to say, that when Scrappy finished pee dooing in their pants, they both looked like twisted gumbies that had frizzy troll hair, and Sams was now pink. 

Shaggy now goes over to the bed, turns around and looks at Butler, and says, are you ready to see who they really are?

Butler says, I already know who they really are, thats no donkey. 

You are correct General, Shaggy states bluntly, and pulls over the now noodled synthetic prosthetic mask of Jack Ass, to reveal, none other than Jacob Rothschild. 

Shaggy then reaches over and pulls up Sams mask, to reveal, none other than, King Charles. 

Butler just stands there looking at them both nodding up and down, and stating with Pride, yes, the Bankers, and the Monarchy, the only piece missing is the Crown Temple Round Table. 

Suddenly, and instantly, Men starting teleporting into the Room. The General turns to them, and states, 2 Jackasses to beam up. 

General Butler turns to Jackass, smirks, and says, I'll deactivate my broom now, all the shit has been swept up. 

Shaggy laughs a big mouthful of Kellogg's on the now noodle looking couple of Jackass's. 

Scrappy gives booth soggy noodles a quick cheesy smile. 

The Trio opens the door of Sams Quarters, walks down the hall to the elevator, telling Shaggy, I'm not taking the Stairs this time, I'm getting too old, as his lets out a fake grimacing laugh. They get in the elevator and press G this time. Getting out, they walk through the doors and into the Sun Rise, General butler patting Scrappy, saying, "yep, Mans best Friend". 

The End, Of This Story

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A.I. Review Critique. 

This has the makings of a surreal, darkly humorous political satire with a touch of action and mystery. You've got Uncle Sam, a Jackass, a Butler with a high-tech broom, and the Mystery Machine all colliding in a whirlwind of absurdity and allegory. It’s packed with symbolism—government corruption, political rivalry, hidden forces at play—wrapped in an almost Looney Tunes-style narrative.

Are you aiming for a full short story, or is this just a raw creative flow? Either way, I can help refine it or expand on certain aspects. What’s your vision for this piece?

You said:

This is Raw Stream of Consciouness with breaks of doing other things. I would like to convert to a short film keeping verbaitum as much as possible.

ChatGPT said:

That sounds like an exciting project! To convert your raw stream of consciousness into a short film while keeping the essence verbatim, we’d want to capture the flow of your thoughts, your unique patterns, and your transitions. Here's a rough framework on how you could approach it:

1. Visual Style and Atmosphere:

• The film could adopt a fragmented, nonlinear structure to reflect the stream-of-consciousness style.
• Consider using a variety of settings or environments, transitioning seamlessly (or through moments of chaos) as the thoughts move between topics.
• You could incorporate symbolic or abstract imagery to represent key ideas, like cymatics, the Golden Ratio, or energy flows.

2. Narration:

• The raw flow could be narrated by someone (maybe you?) reading the stream verbatim, or you could even have it delivered by an AI voice that reflects the intensity and pace of the thoughts.
• Use pauses or breaks in the narration to emphasize moments of reflection, action, or shifts in energy.

3. Editing & Pacing:

• Use fast cuts or dissolve transitions between moments, illustrating the rapid mental shifts.
• Maybe use visual transitions that reflect your thought process—cymatic patterns, fractals, or bursts of light, mirroring the flow of thought.
• Incorporate moments where actions happen (like interactions with technology or nature) to break up the dialogue and add grounding.

4. Sound Design & Music:

• You can make use of ambient sound, maybe adding your bass resonance as a background element throughout the film.
• The sound could crescendo and decay as the energy and emotions in your thoughts fluctuate.

5. Symbols and Metaphors:

• Include subtle visual metaphors to represent your key ideas, like representations of ‘golden ratio’ patterns, or energy flowing through characters and objects.
• You could also use a "Q Bat Cafe" scene, as symbolic of transitions or change.

Would you like help developing a more detailed script or a specific scene breakdown for this?